Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Introspection

[nb: this was never meant to be a fully constructed rant, but I liked it and thought "what the hell". I apologize for the large blocks of unorganised and unrefined text, and the more rantish nature of the rant.]


Who am I?


I am me. I am the corporal form of my intelligence, emotions, and moral code. I strive for my moral values, I shun unattractive entities, I learn, mold, and adapt. I hold a strong value to intellectual stimulus, with a lesser kinship to emotions. I live through a constant influx of numbers that translate me to the rest of the world. I am my ideas, ideas slightly different from everyone else. I condone, promote and encourage intellectual advancement, as well as shun any block to the advancement of knowledge. I encourage the free exchange of Ideas, regardless of the values those ideas hold. I hold a deep disgust of anything preventing a free exchange of ideas, no matter how unacceptable they are by the values of current society, for it is my belief that, while societies come and go, Ideas wander through time, unchanged. I am allergic to the idea of the destruction of knowledge, be it through burning a library, silencing an opinion, or promoting one set of values over another. I live my life through numbers: the constant numbers of time, the regular numbers of our exchanges of goods and services, the numbers that evaluate our intelligence quota, the numbers that change our life on a daily basis. I strive to collect and analyze those numbers to further reveal what it is to be us. To be human. I strive for logic, and dismiss opinions founded on emotions. I enjoy the chaotic flux of life, and am quickly bored by the stagnant. I live for change – be it of numbers, of values, of life. I am the combination of an infinite amount of thoughts, feelings, emotions, values, as are you, as is he, as is she. I am me.


Am I free?


I am free to the extent that a human can be free: I may think my thoughts, develop them, and exchange them with others. While still bound by the innate laws of nature, I am free to expand my thoughts until they encompass all I know, and am free to be able to distill those thoughts to paper for others to pick up and tinker with. I am free to think, to express, and have reached the limit of freedom allowed a human being: I am free to, in a large fashion, control my life, and to a limited extent the lives of those around me, the most we humans may be able to claim as their own. I am free to think, which is the only true, unlimited and unregulated feat left for us. While our bodies are bound by laws that we do not fully understand, our minds our free to explore to the limits of our imaginations. I am free to take these ideas and do with them as I please – I may decide to do nothing, or I may attempt to revolutionize the world with the fragments of thought in my head. I am free to act upon what I deem necessary, within the omnipotent laws of nature. I am free to rally those around me, and am free to express my opinion. I am free to bear the full responsibilities of my opinion and its impact on society, no matter how broad the term “society” might dictate. I am free to be as free as my situation dictates I should be. I am free, yet a slave to the freedom of those around me, because humans may never be truly free without bringing about the destruction of freedom. I am free to truthfully answer the question as to whether or not I am free, and by doing that, prove that I am, indeed, as free as I am able to be.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Meditation

Apology
Bah. This is what happens when too much happens at once: you forget to just sit down and collect your thoughts. Apologies for the lack of updates, for the random people that pass by, and all 15 of you people who have such a lack of life that you subscribe to the blog. Yay RSS feeds.

Stupid Intellectuals


A thing I've noticed in the past bunch of years is that it's become less and less cool to be smart. I was talking with a cousin's daughter, currently enrolled as a junior in Andover, and she's told stories of smart girls who dumb themselves down to not be shunned by the rest of their school. Now, for little old me, not only is this the highest on my "wtf" list, but it's also very unnerving: the next generation is being told that it's not good to be smart.

Now, not to sound like a soccer momm-ey, but I blame the media. Kinda. Our society forces people to give us what we want in order to make money, and T.V. is doing just that. After Survivor came out, the people clamored for more reality shows, and that's what the network gave them. Then they wanted worse, and T.V. obliged. It's a vicious circle -- we seem to always want stupid shows, which in turn render us a tad more stupid, making us want to watch stupider shows, which render us more stupid, etc, until we wind up with the IQ of a monkey. Or a celebrity. Same thing.

Which brings me to question number two: Why do we want stupid stuff on T.V? And why just us? If you, again, take a hop over the pond, you'll find the BBC with new documentaries every week and views that challenge pretty much everything, and while there is the odd soap opera, there's nothing compared to the monstrosity of our 100 channels of idiocy. My little hypothesis is that we like to see people that are worse off than us, because it makes us feel better. We like seeing the stupid rich white girls get blasted at a party, because we think that we're better. Unfortunately, there are only so many hours in a day, and when we demand so much of things that are worse than us, there is less time for the actual intelligent stuff. The smart stuff gets pushed to less prime times, until the only thing better than desperate housewives is a documentary on the Survivor series at 2:30 in the morning.

Closing that parenthesis, I wander back to my original point: It is no longer a good thing to be smart. Not geeky smart, that's always been bad in high school, but just book smart. Using polysyllabic words. Reading to pass the time instead of watching TV. I, for one, am quite disturbed by this stupid intellectualism, and hope that it can be changed around soon.

Friday, September 02, 2005

[off the record] White Ravens

[01:32] Scone: hm?
[01:34] Dreamwalkerofyor: that is one kickass raven
[01:34] Scone: heh
[01:34] Dreamwalkerofyor: that's gonna be on my todo list
[01:35] Dreamwalkerofyor: get kickass raven to sit on shoulder
[01:35] Dreamwalkerofyor: and look cool
[01:36] Dreamwalkerofyor: and....raveney
[01:37] Dreamwalkerofyor: ...it can dive bomb four year olds
[01:37] Dreamwalkerofyor: hehe
[01:37] Scone: ,,,
[01:37] Scone: oh yeah
[01:37] Scone: i'd love to dive bomb those 4-year-olds
[01:38] Dreamwalkerofyor: "mommy mommy look CAW! CAW AURGH MEIN EIEZ"
[01:38] Scone: you know my thing for little girls
[01:38] Dreamwalkerofyor: I can train it to only dive bomb german kids
[01:38] Dreamwalkerofyor: so they can be like SIEG HEIL HEIL HEIL CAW CAW
[01:38] Dreamwalkerofyor: ....or something
[01:39] Dreamwalkerofyor: *bored*
[01:39] Dreamwalkerofyor: hehe
[01:39] Dreamwalkerofyor: vicious is jesus christ
[01:39] Scone: ...
[01:39] Scone: reverse that
[01:40] Dreamwalkerofyor: bah
[01:40] Dreamwalkerofyor: figures
[01:40] Dreamwalkerofyor: google raven and the first two images are teen titans
[01:40] Dreamwalkerofyor: stupid people have no respect for cool raveney
[01:41] Dreamwalkerofyor: ...thingies
[01:41] Dreamwalkerofyor: nevermore!
[01:42] Dreamwalkerofyor: oh, that'd so kick ass
[01:42] Dreamwalkerofyor: an albino raven
[01:42] Dreamwalkerofyor: it'd be like, a social commentary in the form of a kickass bird
[01:43] Dreamwalkerofyor: hmm
[01:43] Dreamwalkerofyor: there are images of albino ravens
[01:43] Dreamwalkerofyor: so they exsist
[01:43] Scone: ...
[01:43] Dreamwalkerofyor: ...wonder if their still carrion feeders
[01:43] Dreamwalkerofyor: the white ones
[01:44] Dreamwalkerofyor: ...
[01:44] Dreamwalkerofyor: *bored*
[01:44] Dreamwalkerofyor: *doesnt want to write*
[01:44] Dreamwalkerofyor: *bloggs conversation*